I believe it is quite obvious that the times I post on here are fewer and farther between. Not for lack of things to write, but for lack of desire to voice them here I suppose. My journal seems more fitting, or in one on one conversations with those I most closely associate myself with. I am still holding on to the world of xanga though...by a thread at least.

So, since I voiced what great things I thought the Lord would do in Argentina, I thought it necessary to say that He did. It was unbelievable. The stories could write a book. But I would prefer to just share one. I think less is more and you'll be more likely to remember it that way.

We were evangelizing in Buenos Aires and a man came up and asked me for a tract I had. This man was so hungry to hear what we had to share. Through a translator from Peru, and a Word of Life Staff member from Hungary, as well as myself, this man heard the gospel and put his trust in the Lord Jesus Christ. God could have used anyone, and He certainly didn’t need to use me; my translator could have shared the truth on her own. And yet God chose to bless me when I wasn’t even looking for it.

None of us our worthy of salvation, and certainly not the blessing of leading others to Christ. Yet God, in His love, allows us be used for His glory. There is no greater joy.

I leave for Argentina in less than 24 hours.

I'm a little overwhelmed.

And it's been forever since I've updated.

So let me do the general life update thing.

God is good. Period.

I guess I could stop there, but I won't.

Winter quarter was challenging and breaking.God is sustaining.

I've been learning sooooo much! And I am so blessed.

This fall, Lord willing, as plans are now...I will be interning with Word of Life Gospel Productions as the Radio intern. I'll help write scripts for the WOL Radio program. And I'll be taking classes to finish my degree through Liberty University while discipling girls on campus. Could it be any better?

Tomorrow I leave for Buenos Aires, Argentina. I'm so excited to see how God is going to work. Be praying that we will all be completely surrendered to His will. Especially me. I need that. I want HIM to be glorified in me.

This entry is so random...but my mind is going 50 miles an hour.

Read John 15:4-5. I claiming that verse this quarter.

I'm serious. Go get your Bible and read it. I'll wait.

We got half a foot of snow today. And tomorrow it will be 75 degrees where I'm headed.Smile.

Remember why you're alive. Because of His death. -Lindsey 

Sometimes I just want it to be quiet.

Sometimes I just want to think 

Sometimes I just don't want to think at all.

Sometimes I just want to be left to be.

Sometimes I wouldn't mind get included.

Sometimes I get tired of being second choice.

Sometimes I can't stand being the leftover.

Sometimes I just want what I used to have.

Sometimes I want the future.

Sometimes I'm too scared to reach for it though.

Sometimes I know I can't obtain it.

Sometimes I don't want to fill out another paper.

Or go to another meeting.

Or check another thing of my list.

Sometimes I don't want to be the student...the RA...the trip leader...the unit leader....the friend...the roomate...the third party...the meeting planner...the bakery worker...the 'you name it'. Not because I don't like any of it, but because sometimes I want to be me. To look in the mirror and see myself. A girl. Nothing else. No opinions formed, reputation made, no responsibilities given or tasks to accomplish, none of my interests or abilities, nothing that makes people like or not like me.Just the heart. The reality. To closely examine who I am and what I'm learning. But peope don't ask. Cause no one truly cares. We just say we do. And I'm tired of that. 

Sometimes I just want to be....Lindsey.

Just plain Lindsey.

But is that possible? To distinguish between who I am and what I do? Between what I want and what I need? Between where I am and where I'm headed? Is who I am what I do? Is the opinion others have of me based on my abilities or inabilities? Based on titles or possessions? If everything changed, would it stay the same? Could I just be me and would everything be the same? To let down my guard, the pretenses, the roles.

Sometimes when I want, I pray that all I will want is God and God alone.

It's been a while since I've updated huh?

God has been teaching me so much. And His grace is so sufficient.

I don't really know what I care to write about. I've been thinking a little about why I minister. What is my motive? Is it love or duty? Do I really LOVE others? I can't on my own. It has to be Christ. So if I don't love others it's becuase I don't love God enough. I want to minister from love, not for them, not for me, not to please or look good, but because I love them and I want them to know God more.

I've been thinking about this song I heard recently which is what I feel and what I desire for my girls to feel. It's by Jeremy Camp and it's called: My Desire

You want to be real
You want to be empty inside
You want to be someone laying down your pride
You want to be someone someday
Then lay it all down before the King
You want to be whole
You want to have purpose inside
You want to have virtue and purify your mind
You want to be set free today then lay it all down before the King

This is my desire
This is my return
This is my desire to be used by you

You want to be real
You want to be emptied inside
And I know my heart is to feel you near
And I know my life
It's to do your will
It's to do your will

All my life I have seen where you've taken me
Beyond all I have hoped and there's more left unseen
There's not much I can do to repay all you've done so I give my hands to use